“I like, totally only fuck guys with huge cocks,” she said, looking me up and down.

“I can see that,” I replied.  

We ordered more drinks and we kept on talking, but what was there to say?  There was no witty banter that could change the situation, and there was no convincing, finagling, or downright lying that would make one fucking difference. Not that I didn’t try.

“What do you know about physics?” I asked her out of the blue.

“I know about the hard-on collider.  Or whatever it’s called.”

“So, you know that really small things can be in multiple spaces at once, right?”

“I guess so.”

“So, if for instance, my cock was so tiny that it was a quantum entity, then I could fuck you now, yesterday, tomorrow, and a million times at once all at exactly the same time.”

“Say that again?”

“I just mean that if I have a really small penis, I mean so small that it’s a unique quantum entity, then I could theoretically penetrate you in a multi-dimensional time-space feedback loop that would be exactly the same as if I had a ginormous penis.”

“Did you just say ginormous?”

“Um, yea?  That’s one of the words I used.”

“So, like you have a big one?”

“Theoretically,” I replied as I leaned in close. 

“Huh, you know what?  I think I’d probably prefer an honest nine-inch cock in this temporal space than a theoretical particle/wave instance of a multi-dimensional penetrative state.  But thanks for the cosmo! It was like, totally yummy.”

I smiled.  She smiled. 

“I have a friend you might like,” I said, leaning back in my chair.

“Now I’m listening…”